This Is For YOU

This is for you. For your courageous self, for the shy, the outrageous, timid, loud, fat, skinny, ridge, flexible, stingy, generous YOU! That’s right I’m talking to You ~ each and everyone of You.

I am struck by what it takes to get out of bed each day. To not give up. To choose to continue on what ever path you are walking. You are out in the world BEING you. That my friends is not necessarily an easy task.

We are bombarded everyday with what society claims they want us to be, look like, wear, even down to the way we wash our skin. Yet, I would tell you this isn’t what we want ~ look at your friends ~ they are your friends and mine…why? Because they are exactly who they are! With all the frills, bells and whistles that make them the unique person they are.

I am struck also by the courage it takes for us to be true to ourselves. To choose to grow, push against our edges, to reach out to a friend and ask for support. To laugh at our silly serious selves. Yes, even to choose on some level to stay stuck in our own mud pit. Some days I wonder what it is my friends see in me ~ who is it that they know that I don’t seem to. I wish I could take out my eyes, borrow yours for just a moment to get a glimpse of the me that you like, love, hate.

This is for you, my friend ~ I See You and through your eyes I am able to see me. Thank you for this gift of friendship. I am blessed by your gift.

I See YOU, this is for you ~ in the words of edward estlin cummings

i carry your heart with me
(i carry it in my heart)
i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)

i fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)
i want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

This is for YOU, dear friend, for indeed I carry you with me each day~ it is that You See Me that I AM . Thank you, from the bottom of my soul.


the heart of me, my home is indeed my kitchen - my love comes through to you with what is created there. Self in shadow - it could be you as we are one.

It's All About the Process.

Food, art, friendships, these things don’t tend to happen in an instant. There is also a great deal of mystery and alchemy that happens in each of these processes to my way of thinking any way. I am grateful for those moments of magic, when you have a sense of what you want something to come out like – yet you’re not sure what it will be like in the next moment.

I have gotten to know people in ways that I have had to stand back and go WOW! I would never have thought or known how amazing this person is, if I’d not been willing to stay with the process of getting to know them, of looking beyond what met my eye.

Food, the time it takes to prepare a dish, that brings us to a place of comfort when we need it. Having to check to see if we have all the ingredients…then the process of preparing….We know perhaps what it will be …yet each time, the moment is new. The dish recalling old memories and creating new places.

I am constantly amazed when I silk screen at the magic that happens there as well. I have a general idea of what I think I want – yet until the colour meets the screen and the paper – the Image of what will be is unknown.

There is a certain amount of that kind of mystery and magic when it comes to living into our authentic selves as well. We are not always sure how or what that may look like to others. My question is does it feel right inside? A bit edgy as we make the changes we need as we become truer to who we are? I think all of this is a good thing, it says, out of our comfort zone. It gives us a chance to laugh and or cry….and as my grandchild once said to me…..”You know a good cry just washes everything clean.” A new beginning.

As I have watched myself change some of my favorite recipes to fit the fact that I can no longer eat wheat, I have found I am more able to stay with that same sort of gentle process, as I look deeper into me. I am always grateful to friends who are willing to let me try out new food creations – I find that I am also eternally Amazed and Grateful that as I grow into myself, deeper, truer, more of ME – that my friends are willing to stand by my side and Love me all the more.

I Hope for all of you, the same wonder as you explore who YOU are becoming as the tides of the world ask us to stand up and be counted. To walk to the Well of Compassion, to Honour all Life, to be the Divine Beings we are meant to be.

May Grace be with you.





If you close you will see how the image changes...each colour adding itself to the print. Begin- April 14th - May 13th 2010 Moon calendar.

Saturday Morning Baking

For a Celebration of Life
Sweets for the sweet
To pay the Ferryman
A place to Honour the life of a friend

An almost full Moon
This day of Celebration
I will hold all Friends this day

For some are old and some are new
It doesn't change that they be
Friend
Someone that will hold and soothe
An aching Heart
To tell me when I'm out of line
And love me none the less
I know I can count on you
I hope you count on me

I love you dear
My Amazing friend
Know always I hold you dear
Even when I might forget
To say
Thank you for being
My friend.



Blue Corn Biscotti

2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/4 cups granulated sugar
1/2 cup stone-ground blue cornmeal
3 tablespoons stone-ground yellow cornmeal
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
8 tablespoons unsalted butter, at room temperature
2 large eggs
1 cup pinon nuts – lightly toasted or pecans

Directions
Preheat the oven to 375°F Line a baking sheet with parchment paper. Assemble your ingredients.
In the bowl of an electric mixer, whisk together the flour, sugar, blue and yellow cornmeal, baking powder, and salt.With the mixer set at its lowest speed, add the butter to the dry ingredients, a little at a time, beating until the mixture resembles coarse meal. Beat in the eggs, one at a time. Stir the liqueur into the dough until incorporated. Stir in the nuts until the dough is thoroughly blended and holds together in a ball.Transfer the dough to the baking sheet and gently press to form a log measuring approximately 3 inches wide, 1 1/2 inches high, and 10 inches long. Bake for about 25 minutes, or until lightly browned. Remove from the oven and allow to rest for at least 2 hours or for as long as 8 hours.
Before second baking, reheat the oven to 350°F.
Using a serrated knife, carefully cut the log crosswise into 1/3-inch thick slices. Lay the slices on the same parchment paper-lined baking sheet and bake for 8 to 10 minutes or until lightly browned around the edges but still slightly soft in the middle. For more even baking, turn the biscotti over after 4 minutes. Remove from the oven and cool on the baking sheet.

Though this piece was written in 2006 before some of us gathered to honour our friend Ronette, it is no less important to me today. Love to you all.

Murder of Crow!

How many crow are in a murder? Enough to fill a pie? Four and 20? I don’t rightly know ~ what I do know is that on this particular Sunday I indeed have a murder of Crow in my kitchen. Now for most this might be upsetting ~ for me it brings a gladness!

You might be wondering about this – though the photo that is posted makes it a bit clear that they are not alive ~ well that’s not the word I might use. I am glad to have them in my tiny little kitchen, I am also grateful that they are here today. Today marks six years to the day that many of us gathered to share and acknowledge the passing of a friend.

It is because of this friend, Rick Rudolph that the rendition of a moon calendar were first printed. I had desired to be able to let him know that I was thinking of him during his illness. Sadly, my friend, artist and fellow human never saw a single calendar. He passed before the year came anew. I find ~ I still miss him.

I am reminded that we never truly don’t have folks in our lives, once we have created space at our table for them, they are forever with us. They leave a mark as playful or hurtful as we allow. This murder of Crow that hangs on the line…well, they will become the next New Moons marking. Falling on Valentine’s Day, and the Tibetan New year, prayer paper behind them on the calendar, it is a reminder to me and hopefully to those that receive the calendar to remember to tell those they love of their love. In the blink of an eye, all things can and do change.

There is also a gladness for me around this printing as I am aware of how much I missed the magic and mystery of silk screening; for the last three seasons of summer, fall and most of winter I have not printed. On this anniversary and the second printing of the Moon Calendar for the year, thank you Rick. Thank you Tirzah, Ann. Debbie and Mo, friends who have stood gently by asking and reminding me of this magic.

My kitchen magic depends on being able to create for myself and to have the warmth of friendship at my table. Art for me is a bit like cooking you can know what goes into creating something ~ yet one; or at least I depend on the kitchen magic; I never truly know how they will be in the end. I am grateful for all my friends, those I still have near and those that are near to me, as whispers on the wind. I want you all to know that you are loved. If I have forgotten to tell you today…I am telling you NOW. I love you!

May you find ways to feed your soul, as well as your body.





photo taken in my kitchen 31 January 2010